Category: Dating and Relationships
Someone wrote to @TheHouseOfWTF, seaking advice on flirting, and here's his answer. The direct URL is at the bottom. What do Y'all think of it?
Frankie, I'm 20 and I never know how to flirt (and never had a bf). I always get uncomfortable whenever a guy gets flirty w me, I think it's bec I get too conscious w what I might say or do. And also -- forward thinking -- I don't know how to kiss. What should I do w this?
You need to reverse that. You need to stop being so aware of yourself and start being aware of the people around you. Being attractive is usually about being selfless. They say people prefer to be listened to than talked at. Let them do the talking.You just season their speech with the odd one-liner here and there. Compliment
them rather than insult them. Make eye-contact. Smile. Laugh at their jokes. If you can make them laugh, you're half way there. Don't worry about what you might say or do. I say and do weird things all the time. People find that more interesting than when people are ordinary and boring.
Dress well. Never underestimate the power of personal style really brings out your personal story, your you.
If they're flirting with you and you like the person, try a little body contact. I don't mean dry hump them or anything. Just touch them on their arm or shoulder. It relaxes them. It shows them you're interested.
It is important that you don't ignore them. They don't know you're over-conscious. If you don't make eye-contact and smile, they will interpret that as you not being interested.
If you relax them enough, they will do all the work. Flirting is testing really. The person is trying to see if you find them attractive. Your job is to communicate that you do or you don't. This allows them to take it to the next level.
Do whatever it takes to get them to laugh.
If they are flirting with you, you are already talking to them. Find common interests, Take the conversation further.
I've discovered there really is no need to feel self-conscious. There's people out there into scat. There are people out there who want to be shit on and to shit on others. There are chubby chasers. There are people who like having sex with deformed people. There is no definitive attractive person. If someone is flirting
with you, you are what they like.
How to kiss. Just like pretend to eat their mouth. Practice on your hand.
http://ask.fm/a/be13l1o9
Pretty good.
Most of that is very interesting. It lost me with the how to kiss portion though. It's not that you can't describe how to kiss, but there are so many ways. Pretending to eat their mouth? I'm not sure that's a kisser I want.:)
Haha, I know. That was definitely a bit different. I mainly found it good that he was explaining that the person needed to become less self-aware, and more aware of the surrounding people. So many times, people are only interested in being listened to. They'll talk your ear off, and then they might ask you something about yourself as an afterthought. Before you can really tell them much of anything, they're right back to getting the attention focused back on them.
Seconded, pretending to eat their mouths is terrible advice unless your eating habits are very sensual and you don't generally bite very hard into the food you're playing with.
I took it to mean eating up what they are saying.
Giving them attenchen as if there the only thing that is mattering right now.
From a visual standpoint, you look at there lips as they talk. When you do that, it is like direct eye contact or face contact.
I gues for blind people focus on there voice and such might do the trick making it appear you are eating there mouths. Smile.
"How to kiss. Just like pretend to eat their mouth. Practice on your hand." Pretty sure he's not talking about listening to them.:)
"
I understand that one too, but I thought we'd not gotten past flirting in this example? Lol
If flirting consist of kissing, I'd assume the flirting was over?
Listen to your hand, big boy! Give your hand the same amount of attention it gives you.
I'm saying this tongue-in-cheek,not to be taken seriously, but I submit that the problem you've got with practicing kissing on your hands, at least if you're into certain parts of the male anatomy, is you may end up going into automatic blowjob mode with your fingers. It's like they extend automatically by the power of suggestion, especially if you haven't had any in a while. You don't learn anything about kissing, and you've definitely gone past the flirting and kissing stages. Better make sure then that you're alone if you don't want anyone seeing you blow your fingers. Hmm. But then, I suppose you get to practice your methodology for those more, uh, special moments? Maybe I should delete this posting.
Hahaha, I like it. glad you went on and posted it.
johndy, I'm pretty sure you don't want anyone catching you practicing kissing on your hand whether or not you're in chaste, respectful kissing mode or full on oral tendencies. Unless of course, you're trying to deliberately turn someone on that way. :)
I completely third or fourth the disagreement with the eating as kissing advice. That sounds like a total turn off.
Well, if we are talking about kissing, lips, above the chin?
I'd agree, someone kissing me like they eat would be a turn off.
Now, about this hand business....
I seriously assume eating there mouth was referring to talking, or attenchen. We were flirting, so?
No, but maybe an erotic bratwurst-eating contest?